I said to myself, “Self,” (and I knew it was me, because I recognized my voice, and I was wearing my underwear) “Today is going to be a great day!” *…I Know My Comedy
Have a good laugh with these great lawyer jokes! (ノ^∇^)
All rise for these funny lawyer
and attorney jokes.
Guilty Of Annoyance
A defendant isn’t happy with how things are going in court, so he gives the judge a hard time.
Judge: “Where do you work?”
Defendant: “Here and there.”
Judge: “What do you do for a living?”
Defendant: “This and that.”
Judge: “Take him away.”
Defendant: “Wait; when will I get out?”
Judge: “Sooner or later.”
The Case Of The Imaginary Dogs
My niece was dragged into court by a neighbor who complained about her barking dogs. At one point, the judge asked the neighbor a question. The neighbor didn’t reply. “Sir, are you going to answer me?” The neighbor leaped to his feet. “Are you talking to me?” he asked. “Sorry; I can’t hear a darn thing.” The case was dismissed.
The Best Legal Advice Ever….
…was spotted on a billboard…
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Happy Eid to all muslim friends and readers! Please stay safe, stay strong, stay healthy & stay happy. Together, we will live through this. （*’∀’人）♥
I dream of a world of peace,
Where people can live a life of ease.
World where there is no difference between rich or poor,
Life being pleasant for living ever more.
I dream of a world of happiness,
Where there is no sight of selfishness.
Where each and everyone can get their needs,
And have belief in their deeds.
I dream of a world of kindness,
Where people can know that the value of love is priceless.
Where people can realize that of earth we are all children,
And to have a kind heart is better for all men.
I dream of a world of loving mates,
Where people can realize all are great.
Where people can know that in this earth,
With a kind heart people must give birth.
I dream of world of peace,
Where people can live a life of ease!
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where the sun shines!
Did you hear my new joke about pee?…. ….Thank God no-one leaked it I wanted to tell a joke about Amazon…. ….But I’d probably fuck up the delivery I …Pissing One-liners Away
Urine luck! Think I’ll reblog this. (´∇ﾉ｀*)ノ
painting on a cake!
Instead of hating We should love Instead of nagging We should be grateful Instead of taking and accumulating We should give Instead of thinking of …Qualities of Light
Instead of commenting on this post, I will reblog it. ~(=^‥^)_旦~
Have a blessed Good Friday! ( ु⁎ᴗ_ᴗ⁎)ु.
God did not bear the cross only 1900 years ago,
but he bears it today,
and he dies and is resurrected from day to day.
It would be poor comfort to the world if it had to depend
upon a historical God who died 2000 years ago.
Do not then preach the God of history,
but show Him as He lives today through you.
– Mahatma Gandhi
“Just put your feet up and chill.”
Have a good laugh with these great one liners…..I’m still laughing (“⌒∇⌒”)
Hear about the snowman who had a big temper-tantrum?….
….It was a real meltdown
I was going to make an anti-masker joke….
….But my parents taught me not to make fun of the mentally disabled.
Why was the anti-vaxxer’s four-year-old crying?….
How do we know that the Corona virus wasn’t made in China?….
….Because we’ve had it for almost a year, and it’s still working.
The spread of COVID depends on two things….
….How dense the population is.
….How dense the population is.
What sound do sheep make?….
….If you don’t vote, you can’t complain.
I have a few jokes about unemployed people….
….But none of them work
My teachers told me I’d never amount to much because I procrastinate….
….I said, “Just you wait.”
Will glass coffins be a success?….
….Remains to be seen
The guy who survived both mustard gas and pepper spray….
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