Things you don’t want to hear during surgery:

…”Everyone stand back, I think I lost my contact lens.”

…”Someone call the janitor, we’re going to need a mop and a bucket.”

…”Sterile, schmerile; at lest the operating-room floor is clean.”

…”Hey, that’s cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?”

…”Nurse, did this patient sign the organ-donor card?”