For many years after you left,
I felt the pain and burden of
all the things that were left unsaid.
I had like a thousand questions to ask you
and a thousand reasons not to.
Through your life struggles and illness
you had shown me what truly matters in this world.
But today, I’ll remember you in the happiest way.
Thoughts of you make me smile,
knowing you are now free and
and resting peacefully in heaven.
“Happy 88th birthday, Dad!
May the angels sing joyously to you today.”
“Deeply, I know this, that love triumphs over death. My father continues to be loved, and therefore he remains by my side.” – Jennifer Williamson
Hi there, Dad
Today marks 19 years since you left. Thinking of you with love as I reflect how much we do have in common, though I look more like mom.
We both love….
~ coffee & tea. When I was young you used to pour the coffee into the saucer cos the coffee was too hot. Oh, how I loved to drink from the saucer then.
~ snacks. We love to snack while watching the television.
~ music. We love Elvis Presley and we both love to sing.
~ animals. Thank you for all the pets you had brought home. I had dogs, bunnies, cats, fishes, tortoise though mom was not that enthusiastic then about having pets at home.
We were both good drivers and we admire antique and fancy cars. (I still like to drive a manual car).
We have a great sense of humour.
We have a lot of patience. (But I think my patience is wearing thin since the day I got married, Dad. LOL!)
You were not a perfect dad. You made mistakes and you had flaws.
And you had your fair share of trials and tribulations during your life journey here.
But that’s okay, Dad. What’s important is that you were real, you did the best you could and your love was unconditional.
Thank you, Dad for being real and for being you – a simple, humble, kind, honest and generous person.
Much love and hugs, Pat
Dearest Aunt Ying
As I write this letter to you,
my heart is filled with love.
Three years had passed but
the memory of you still warms my heart.
You often spoke about the importance of family.
I believe the Christmas lunch party
which you organized each year
was your way of keeping the family together.
And I’m glad your daughters have kept this tradition going.
You once told me that my presence is more important
than the presents under the Christmas tree.
I came, Aunt Ying on Christmas day
though I was a little late.
I felt your presence when I was in your home.
Your presence is felt on every floorboard,
the walls and the lights.
Your voice is echoed through
every room and hallway.
And I hear you still.
You were simple yet elegant.
And you enjoyed the simple things in life,
one who cared not about status or luxury though
you were blessed with a very comfortable life.
You were connected with nature
through your love for gardening.
You need no wi-fi cos
you had found the best connection
in the beauty of your garden.
I had enjoyed those times
just having tea and chatting with you
in your living room.
I miss your wit and your wisdom.
I know you’re at peace now, Aunt Ying
resting in the arms of our dear Lord.
And we shall meet again one day on
the other side of the stars.
Going on 18 years now since my dad was called home.
And it took me a long time to realize that
the process of grieving is not
something one can ignore.
It is not about being weak or strong
or how long one should grieve.
Grieving is a journey of acceptance.
A new way of seeing.
A lesson on life and death.
An awakening to living a true life.
Grief is an act of love we have
for those we love and hold so dear.
It is really a journey of love in the presence
to a new journey of love in the absence.
Hello again, Aunt Ying
I thought about you today. Though it is nothing new as I often thought about you in silence and whenever I see the beautiful plants and colourful flowers at the nursery near my home.
I remember those times we sat and talked. Talking to you was always a treat.
We once talked about life and death. You told me that one day you will die and I said, “Aunt, please don’t say that.” But you said, “It’s a fact we must all accept.” You then showed me a beautiful photo of yourself and said it will be the photo of your final journey.
Not too long after that you told me that you had trouble sleeping and you were getting quite forgetful. I did not feel anything amiss at that time cos I was rather forgetful myself too.
I feel sad and helpless when you told me you could no longer drive or do your own shopping. I know how much you loved to be independent. You said you would never want to be a burden to your family.
Also, you often spoke about your two loving daughters, both have made you felt really loved and blessed as a mother. And how much you loved and enjoyed being a grandma to your two wonderful grandsons.
I thought about my visit to your home with Sydelle and Shaye in November 2016. You said you felt very tired. Though you did not say much on that day, you looked at Sydelle and Shaye and uttered “They are very beautiful”. Something you often said about the girls when we meet. I’m thankful that we visited you that day. But I never thought that would be our last goodbye.
Today, I will light a candle for you to let you know,
I miss your smile
I miss your voice
I miss your wit and your wisdom.
Rest in peace, Aunt Ying!
I shall see you one day on the other side of the stars.
Much love, Pat
“Dogs come into our lives to teach us about love,
they depart to teach us about loss.
A new dog never replaces an old dog,
it merely expands the heart.
If you have loved many dogs
your heart is very big.”
Remembering our gentle monster today, exactly 4 years since his passing. Forever loved and always in our hearts.
today is January 7th
the same date seventeen years ago
at the wee hour of the morning
when I held you in my arms as you
struggled and breathe your last.
The last time Mom and I visited you
at the cemetery was quite some time ago
Not that we have forgotten you but
we believe your spirit dwells
in our hearts and not at the place
where we laid you to rest.
I’m glad I visited you today, Dad
I believe you were at the cemetery too.
I found peace within as I reminisce on the
lessons learned after your passing…
Life is too short to be grumpy
There’s hope in the midst of adversity.
Our success or failures does not
define who we are.
Life is about being joyful.
And there’s joy…
in being yourself
in giving & sharing
in the midst of pain and suffering,
May we find the strength
to let go of our past…
the years of pain and difficulties that
we had somehow survived and have made
us more compassionate and resilient.
May our hearts be filled with
love, joy and peace
as we continue to live
joyfully in the moment.
Hello Aunt Ying
I can’t believe it’s been a year since you left us.
I thought about you often after your passing.
And you even appear in my dream twice.
I’m glad you’re now free and at peace,
re-united again with grandma, uncle PW, and my dad.
I believe they were there to welcome you with open arms.
Only when I was in my 20s and started working
that I got to know you better.
You seemed stern and strict to us when we were young.
But the truth was you were kind, understanding and witty.
And you were the aunt who would call me occasionally
to see how I was doing and for that I thank you.
Today, I want to remember
… your beautiful smile
… your warm hug
…your caring heart
…your love for gardening,
and your beautiful garden.
Also to let you know that
you’re in our thoughts today and
we believe your spirit still lives among us.
Memories of you will continue
to linger in our hearts and
we will always miss you.