Scientists have identified a food that, once digested, can have negative effects on people’s health that last for decades, including mood-swings in women, psychotic episodes in men and severe depression in both.
It’s called ‘wedding cake’.
Tag Archives: funny jokes
Joke of the day – The ninety-year-old
Ninety-year-old Jack goes to his doctor for a check-up. A few weeks later, the doctor sees him in the streets with a gorgeous, much younger woman on his arm.
“You’re really doing well, aren’t you?” he tells the elderly man.
Jack replies, “Just doing what you said Doctor: Get a hot mama and be cheerful.”
“No,” says the doctor. “I said,”You’ve got a heart murmur – be careful.”
Joke of the day – Our neighbour’s cat
Our neighbour’s cat was run over by a car, and the mother quickly disposed the remains before her four-year-old son Johnny found out about it. After a few days, though, Johnny asked about the cat.
“Johnny, the cat died, ” his mother explained. “But it’s alright. He’s up in heaven with God.”
The boy asked, “What in the world would God want with a dead cat?”
Joke of the day – Cow & chicken
A cow and a chicken break out of prison and make their way to the border. Hiding behind a bush, they peer out at the checkpoint on the other side of a road, the only thing that stands between them and freedom.
The chicken looks at the cow and says sadly, “You go on. I’ll have to turn back here.”
“But, why?” the bewildered cow asks.
The chicken’s eyes move slowly from the armed guards at the checkpoint to the road in from of them. Then he says, “If I cross that road, it might raise a lot of questions.”
Joke of the day – The argument
“Pour me a double whisky. I’ve just had an argument with my wife.” Sam tells Charlie the bartender.
“Oh, yeah?” says Charlie. “Who won?”
“Put it like this,” says Sam. “When it was all said and done, she came crawling to me on her hands and knees.”
“Really?” says Charlie. “What did she say?”
“Come out of the bed you snivelling coward.”
Joke of the day – Heaven or Hell
A writer died and St. Peter offered her the option of going to heaven or hell. To help decide, she asked for a tour of each destination. St. Peter agreed and decided to take her to hell first.
As she descended into the fiery pits, the writer saw row upon row of writers chained to their desks in a steaming sweatshop. As they worked, they were repeatedly whipped with thorny lashes by demons. “Oh, my,” the writer said, “let me see heaven.”
A few moments later, as they ascended into heaven, the writer saw rows of writers, chained to their desks in a steaming sweatshop. As they worked, they, too, were whipped with thorny lashes by demons. “Hey,” the writer said, “this is just as bad as hell!”
“Oh, no it’s not,” St. Peter replied. “Here, your work gets published.”
Joke of the day – Talking rabbit
A rabbit went to an employment agency to find work. Astonished, the man behind the desk searched through his files and found the perfect position.
“There’s a vacancy for a talking rabbit at the local circus,” said the man.
“What’s good about that?” replied the rabbit. “I’m a qualified plumber.”
Joke of the day – The Guardian Angel
Walking down the street one day, a woman heard a voice yell, “Stop, If you take one more step you will be killed!” The woman stopped, and seconds later a brick fell and landed in her path.
A minute or two after that, she was getting ready to cross the street when same voice bellowed. “Halt! Don’t cross the street now!” An out-of-control beer truck soon careened around the corner and didn’t even slow down as it ran the red light.
Shaken, the woman asked out loud, “Who are you?”
“I’m your guardian angel, the voice replied. “I imagine you have some questions for me.”
“You bet I do,” the woman said. “Where were you on my wedding day?”
Joke of the day – The night at the farmhouse
Harry and Sam were travelling together when their car broke down in the country. They approached the farmhouse and were well received by Widow Mary who fed them and put them up for the night.
It was about nine months later when Harry rang Sam. “Remember the night the car broke down out in the country?” he asked. “You didn’t by any chance slip into the widow’s bedroom did you?”
Sam admitted he did. “And you didn’t by any chance use my name did you?”
Sam admitted he did, and said he was sorry.
“Don’t worry about it, Sam,” said Harry. “I’ve just got a letter from a legal firm that says she has died and left me the farm.”
Joke of the day – Newspapers
NEWSPAPERS are still credible, provided you read between the LIES.
You should never tell a journalist what you don’t want to read in the papers.
New Bloggy Cat [NBC] 