(Clipart by http://www.gallerygraphics.com)
A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting. The biologist shoots at a deer and misses five feet to the left. The chemist takes a shot and misses five feet to the right. The statistician yells “We got ’em!”
(Photo credit: http://www.cafepress.co.uk)
I’m a nobody,
nobody is perfect,
and therefore I’m perfect!
Am I ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
(Pic credit: http://www.funinmarriage.com)
They call our language the mother tongue
because the father seldom gets to speak!
(Pic credit: http://www.grinningplanet.com)
Whenever I go near a bank
I get withdrawal symptoms.
(Photo credit: http://www.justpo.st)
Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed?
Because she couldn’t control her pupils.
Two kids are sitting in a high school auditorium, listening to the principal give the welcoming speech for the year.
The principal says, “The two greatest dangers that students face are ignorance and apathy.”
One of the students turns to his friend and asks, “Dude, what’s ignorance and apathy?'”
The other student, bored and restless and wanting for the speech to end says, “I don’t know and I don’t care.”
Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape.
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