“Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.”
― Alexander Pope
Author Archives: Newbloggycat
Joke of the day – Political definitions
Capitalism: You possess two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
Socialism: You possess two cows. You give one of them to your neighbour.
Communism: You possess two cows. The government confiscates them and provide you with milk.
Nazism: You possess two cows. The government confiscates them and shoots you.
European Common Market: You possess two cows. The government confiscates them, shoots one, milks the other and pour it down the drain.
Quote of the day – Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
“The most beautiful people I’ve known are those who have known trials, have known struggles, have known loss, and have found their way out of the depths.” ― Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
Joke of the day – The hunting trip
Four men go on a hunting trip. The only hotel in the area is almost full, so they have to bunk two to a room. No one wants to share with Joe because he snores, so the others decide to take turns.
The first man stays with Joe and comes to breakfast the next morning with his hair a mess and his eyes bloodshot.
“What happened to you?” asked his friends. “Joe snored so loudly I just sat up and watched him all night,” he moans.
The following evening, it is the second man’s turn. He also looks awful in the morning.
“Oh, man, that Joe shakes the roof,” he says. “I sat up and watched him all night too.”
The third night is Sam’s turn, a burly ex-rugby player. Next morning he comes down to breakfast looking very fresh.
The first two men are incredulous. “Wow, what happened?”
“Well,” says Sam. “We got ready for bed. I tucked Joe in, wished him sweet dreams and kissed him on the forehead. He sat up and watched me all night.”
Quote of the day – C. S. Lewis
“True humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less.” ― C.S. Lewis
Happiness is …
…a vision of LOVE!
Joke of the day – The birthday present
A wife buys an enormous birthday present for her husband.
He opens it and looks rather confused.
“What am I supposed to do with a rocket?”
“You wanted space,” she replies. “Now get lost.”
Quote of the day – Richard Bach
“Every problem has a gift for you in its hands.” – Richard Bach
Skipping for fitness
Skipping is not just for kids. It’s an excellent workout, especially if you’re short of time. Skipping is an exercise that uses every muscle in your body. It’s a great way to improve general fitness and stamina. So, skip for one minute a day and stay fit!
Funny Poem – My bald dad
“I wouldn’t say my dad was bald but he combs his hair with a sponge;
It’s the first time I had ever seen a parting with ears;
He had been mistaken for a honeydew melon.”
New Bloggy Cat [NBC] 