“What were Tarzan’s last words?”
Who greased that vine!
Bus passenger: “Am I all right for the zoo?”
Bus conductor: “By the look of you I’d say yes — but I’m a bus conductor not a zoologist.”
Fred: “How’s your new girlfriend?”
Doug: “I think we’ll be very happy.”
Fred: “What makes you think that?”
Doug: “She adores me and so do I.
My funny bald dad looks like this if he has long hair.

(Photo credit: http://www.funnyasduck.net)
“A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.”
― Mark Twain
Teacher: “How many feet are there in a yard?”
Bobby: “It depends on how many people are in the yard.”
“You May take 1 day off today.”

(Photo credit: http://www.barkpost.com)
Have a safe and restful Labour Day!
“What happened to the plastic surgeon when he sat near the fire?”
“He melted.”
A man wants to seek legal advice. Before he seek advice, he went to a bar for a drink.
At the bar he saw the sign at the cash register, “In God We Trust, Cash Only.”
He then went to a second bar and saw a similar sign on the wall that says, “In God We Trust, All Others Pay In Cash.”
He proceeded to the first law firm to seek advice. As he entered he saw a religious symbol.
When he went to the second law firm, he saw a large deity.
He then proceed to a third law firm but to his surprise, he did not see any religious symbols. So, out of curiosity, he asked the lawyer, “Why didn’t you put any religious symbols as other law firms do?”
The solicitor replied, “In God we trust. We do not cheat.”
– JM aka Funny Bald Dad