A teacher was testing the children in her Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven. She asked them, “If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into Heaven?”
“NO!” the children answered.
“If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into Heaven?”
Again, the answer was, “NO!”
Now she was smiling. Hey, they’re getting it, she thought! “Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into Heaven?” she asked.
Again, they all answered, “NO!”
She was just bursting with pride for them. “Well,” she continued, “then how can I get into Heaven?”
A five-year-old boy shouted out, “YOU GOTTA BE DEAD.”
Shaye: “Look, Mom! It’s a new tailor shop but the name is spelled wrongly.”
The “t” is missing. It should be “The Best Poke Tailors.”
Me: “The doctor said if you still have a fever by Sunday, you have to go for the dengue fever test.”
Shaye: “Oh no! I hope it’s not donkey fever.”
[Jokes aside, it has been a very stressful week. Shaye, my 8-year old daughter recovered from her fever. Unfortunately, Sydelle, my 12-year old daughter and hubby were diagnosed with dengue fever on Monday, 5.8.19. But they are on the mend and I’m glad they are recovering well and they are in good spirits.]
“What is a wombat?”
Shaye: “A bat that vomits.“
Me: “What’s the name of your bank?”
Sydelle: “Do you know what is algebra?”
Shaye: “Yes, it’s about giraffe and zebra.”
I bought a packet of Epsom salt from the pharmacy.
I poured the salt into an empty plastic container.
And I asked my 9-year old to write “Epsom Salt” on the container with a black marker.
This is what she wrote:
Shaye: “Mom, I don’t like this T-shirt. It’s wrong.”
Me: “What’s wrong with it?”
Shaye: “It says – My Love for Mom and Dad only.
But I want a T-shirt that says –
My Love for Mom and Dad and Sister.”