“Our Father, who does art in heaven.”
“Howard be thy name.”
“Give us this day our jelly bread.”
“Lead a snot into temptation.”
“And deliver us from eagles.”
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You have a special place Dear Lord
that I know you’ll always keep
A special place reserved for dogs
when they quietly fall asleep
With large and airy kennels
and a yard for hiding bones
With maybe a little babbling creek
that chatters over stones.
With wide green fields and flowers
for those who never knew
about running freely under
Your sky of perfect blue.
Lord,I know You keep this Special Place
And so to you I Pray,
For one Special Rottweiler puppy
Who quietly died today
He was full of strength & love
and so very, very cute.
He is dearly missed my Lord
By a very good friend of mine.
He went to join his ancestors
To Your land that is Devine
So, speak to Zap softly please
And give him a warm hello.
He’s a Special gift to you Dear Lord
From Pat, Jan, Sydelle and Shaye, who loved him so.
Original poem by Jan Cooper 1994
The lawyer is standing at the gate to Heaven and St. Peter is listing his sins:
1) Defending a large corporation in a pollution suit where he knew it was guilty.
2).Prosecuting an innocent woman because a scapegoat was needed in a controversial case.
3) Defending an obviously guilty murderer because the fee was high.
4) Overcharging fees to many clients.
And the list went on for quite awhile.
The lawyer objects and begins to argue his case. He admits all these things, but argues, “Wait, I’ve done some charity in my life also.” St. Peter looks in his book and says,“Yes, I see. Once you gave a dime to a panhandler and once you gave an extra nickel to the shoeshine boy, correct?”
The lawyer gets a smug look on his face and replies, “Yes.”
St. Peter turns to the angel next to him and says, “Give this guy 15 cents and tell him to go to hell.”