Teacher: “Do you know what happens to liars when they die?”
Timmy: “Yes, ma’am, they lie still.”
Tag Archives: very funny jokes
Joke of the day -Featherweight
Last night I dreamed that I was weightless.
I was like, Omg.
Joke of the day – Show and tell
A primary one teacher gave her class a “show and tell” assignment. The assignment is to bring something to represent their religion.
Jude: “I’m Jewish and this is the Star of David.”
Mary: “I’m Catholic and this is the Crucifix.”
Tommy: “I’m Baptist and this is a casserole.”
Joke of the day – Sparrow & snail
Sparrow: “Why are you climbing the apple tree. Don’t you know there aren’t any apples on the tree yet?”
Snail: “Yes, but there will be by the time I get up there.”
Joke of the day – Lap_ _ _?
Joke of the day – We are all free
Nursery school teacher: “We live in a great country.
One of the things we should be happy is that, in this country, we are all free.’
Timmy: “I’m not free. I’m four.”
Joke of the day – Cheese
Why did the Greek woman stop feeding her cat cheese?
Because she was getting Feta and Feta.
Joke of the day – Eggs
Why don’t eggs tell jokes?
Because they’d crack each other up.
Joke of the day – Judge & dentist
What did the judge say to the dentist?
“Do you swear to pull the tooth,
the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?”
Joke of the day – Memorial service
Dog owner: “Father, my dog is dead. Could ya’ say a mass for the poor creature?”
Father Lawrence: “I’m afraid not. We cannot have services for an animal in the church. But there are some Baptists down the lane, and there’s no tellin’ what they believe. Maybe they’ll do something for your dog.”
Dog owner: “I’ll go right away Father. Do ya’ think $5,000 is enough to donate to them for the service?”
Father Lawrence: “Sweet Mary, Mother of Jesus! Why didn’t ya tell me the dog was Catholic?
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