Motel Manager: “The room is $25 a night. It’s $10 if you make your own bed.” Guest: “I’ll make my own bed.” Motel Manager: “Good. I’ll get you some nails and wood.”
A businesswoman explained to her doctor that she was always breaking wind at board meetings, during interviews, in lifts and on the tram. It was impossible to control.
Businesswoman: “But at least I am fortunate in two aspects – they neither smell nor make a noise. In fact, you’ll be surprised to know it’s happened twice since I’ve been talking to you, Doc.”
Doctor: (Scribbled a prescription and handed it to her)
Businesswoman: “What? Nasal drops?
Doctor: “Yes, we’ll fix your nose first and then we’ll have a go on your hearing.”