Joke of the day – The poor family

July 14, 2013 | Newbloggycat

A big, burly man visited the pastor’s home and asked to see the minister’s wife, a woman well known for her charitable impulses.

“Madam,” he said in a broken voice, “I wish to draw your attention to the terrible plight of a poor family in this district. The father is dead, the mother is too ill to work, and the nine children are starving. They are about to be turned into the cold, empty streets unless someone pays their rent, which amounts to $400.”

“How terrible!” exclaimed the preacher’s wife. “May I ask who you are?”

The sympathetic visitor applied his handkerchief to his eyes. “I’m the landlord,” he sobbed.

Quote of the day – Angela Schwindt

July 14, 2013 | Newbloggycat

“While we try to teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is all about.” – Angela Schwindt

There is no psychiatrist …

July 13, 2013 | Newbloggycat

…in the world like a puppy licking your face.” – Ben Williams

Joke of the day – Family history

July 13, 2013 | Newbloggycat

Two friends were discussion the family histories when one of them lamented that he knew precious little about his roots. “I’ve always wanted to have my family history traced,” he said, “but I can’t afford to hire someone. Any suggestions?”

“Sure,” replied his friend. “Run for public office,”

Quote of the day – Eleanor Roosevelt

July 13, 2013 | Newbloggycat

“Do what you feel in your heart to be right – for you’ll be criticized anyway. You’ll be damned if you do, and damned if you don’t.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

Joke of the day – The steps to heaven

July 12, 2013 | Newbloggycat

A redhead, brunette and blonde were on their way to Heaven.

God told them the stairway to Heaven was 1000 steps, and on every 5th step He’d tell them a joke. But, they must not laugh or else they couldn’t enter heaven.

The brunette went first and started laughing on the 65th step, so she could not enter Heaven.

The redhead went next and started laughing on the 320th step, so she could not enter Heaven either.

Then, it was the blonde’s turn. When she got to the 999th step, she started laughing.

“Why are you laughing?” God asked. “I didn’t tell a joke.”

“I know,” the blonde replied. “I just got the first one.”

Quote of the day – John C. Maxwell

July 12, 2013 | Newbloggycat

“People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care” ― John C. Maxwell

Joke of the day – Letter to God

July 11, 2013 | Newbloggycat

A little boy wanted 100 dollars badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write a letter to the Lord requesting the money. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to the Lord, they decided to send it to the President

The President was so impressed, touched, and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a 10 dollar bill. The President thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.

The little boy was delighted with the money and sat down to write a thank-you note to the Lord, which read:

Dear Lord, Thank you very much for sending me the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington, and as usual, those jerks deducted 90%. Love, Tommy