0

Joke of the day – New kid

images_cute_boy

Little Johnny had just met the new kid at playgroup.

“How old are you?”

“I don’t know.”

“Do women bother you?”

“No.”

“Then you are five.”

Quote
0

images_funny_cat_clown

“Love of beauty is taste. The creation of beauty is art.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

0

Joke of the day – Gardening

images_lady_gardening

“I can’t find anything to say to my plants, she said while laying newspapers on the garden beds, so I’m giving them something to read instead.”

0

Joke of the day – Restroom

images_men_restroom_sign

Sign at the golf course restroom:

1. Back straight, knees bent, feet shoulder width apart.
2. Form a loose grip.
3. Keep your head down.
4. Avoid a quick back swing.
5. Stay out of the water.
6. Try not to hit anyone.
7. If you are taking too long, please let others go ahead of you.
8. Don’t stand directly in front of others.
9. Quiet please while others are preparing to go.
10. Don’t take extra strokes.

Very good. Now flush the urinal, go outside, and tee off.

0

Joke of the day – Chemistry lesson

images_chest_xray_pneumonia

Professor: Do you know the difference between ammonia and pneumonia?

Student: Sure. One comes in bottles and the other in chests.

0

Funny drawings by Shaye – 03

My house …

Shaye's drawing_house

0

Joke of the day – Foreign aid

images_helping_others

Foreign Aid: The transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries.

2

Funny drawings by Shaye – 02

My funny bald dad…

funny_drawing_bald_dad

0

Joke of the day – Juggler

images_funny_juggler

A juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped by the police. “What are those machetes doing in your car?” asks the cop.

“I juggle them in my act.”

“Oh, yeah?” says the doubtful cop. “Let’s see you do it.” The juggler gets out and starts tossing and catching the knives. Another man driving by slows down to watch.

“Wow” says the passer-by. “I’m glad I quit drinking. Look at the test they’re giving now!”

0

Joke of the day – Road sign

images_girl_at_the_beach

Sign along a roadside overlooking a swimming beach:
DON’T WATCH THE CURVES!