Teacher: What is a comet?
Julie: A star with a tail.
Teacher. Very good. Can you name one?
Julie: Lassie!
Category Archives: Good clean jokes
Joke of the day – Cat Presidents
How many cats have been elected President of the United States?
Thomeows Jefferson
Grow-fur Cleveland
James Meowonroe
Hairy S. Truman
Jimmy Catter
Dwight D. Eisenmeower
And, of course – James A. Garfield!
Joke of the day – Store sign
Sign in a Volksvagen dealership:
‘OUR STORE HAS BUGS’
Joke of the day – Financial statement
Two friends were discussing the difficulty of making ends meet.
“With my current income, I’m having a hard time keeping my head above water,” John commented.
“Head above water!” Bert said. “I’m looking for a longer snorkel.”
Joke of the day – Medical school
Mrs Jones: What is your son doing?
Mrs Smith: He is in medical school.
Mrs Jones: What is he studying?
Mrs Smith: Nothing. They’re studying him.
Joke of the day ~ Mother-in-law’s visit
Jim took his Saint Bernard to the vet.
“Doctor,” he said sadly, “I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to cut off my dog’s tail.”
The vet stepped back, “Jim, why should I do such a terrible thing?”
“Because my mother-in-law’s arriving tomorrow, and I don’t want anything to make her think she’s welcome.”
Joke of the day – The lawyer’s son
The lawyer’s son wanted to follow in his father’s footsteps, so he went to law school and graduated with honors. Then he went home to join his father’s firm.
At the end of his first day at work, he rushed into his father’s office and said, “Father, father! In one day I broke the Smith case that you’ve been working on for so long!”
His father yelled, “You idiot! We’ve been living on the funding of that case for ten years!”
Joke of the day – Beware of dog
Upon entering a little country store, a stranger noticed a warning sign that read: “Danger! Beware of dog!” posted on the door. Inside, he noticed a harmless little dog asleep on the floor beside the cash register.
“Is that the dog folks are supposed to beware of?” he asked the owner. “Yep, that’s him,” came the reply.
The stranger couldn’t help but be amused. “That certainly doesn’t look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?”
“Because,” the owner explained, “Before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him.”
Joke of the day – Loose conduct
“Loose conduct can quickly get you into tight places.”
Joke of the day – A healthy race
Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato?
The lettuce was a ‘head’ and the tomato was trying to ‘ketchup’!
New Bloggy Cat [NBC] 