Joke of the day – Lesson on whales

August 18, 2013 | Newbloggycat

A teacher asked her class what they knew about whales. One little girl spoke up and said that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

The teacher smiled and said she didn’t think that was very likely, because even though whales can be big, their throats are not big enough to swallow a man. But the little girl was adamant, and maintained that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

The teacher was getting impatient, and reiterated that this was physically unlikely. But the girl was unmoved, and said that when she got to heaven, she would ask Jonah.

“But what if Jonah went to hell?” the teacher asked.
The girl replied, “Then you ask him.”

Joke of the day – “Counterfeit”

July 26, 2013 | Newbloggycat

English teacher: ‘Jim, give me a sentence with the word “counterfeit” in it.’

Jim: ‘I wasn’t sure if she was a centipede or a millipede, so I had to count her feet.’

Joke of the day – Lesson on evolution

July 24, 2013 | Newbloggycat

The teacher was going to explain evolution to the children. The teacher asked a little boy.

TEACHER: Tommy do you see the tree outside?

TOMMY: Yes.

TEACHER: Go outside and look up and see if you can see the sky.

TOMMY: Okay.(He returned a few minutes later) Yes, I saw the sky.

TEACHER: Did you see God?

TOMMY: No.

TEACHER: That’s my point. We can’t see God because he isn’t there! He doesn’t exist.

A little girl spoke up and wanted to ask the boy some questions. The teacher agreed and the little girl asked:

LITTLE GIRL: Tommy, do you see the tree outside?

TOMMY: Yes.

LITTLE GIRL: Did you see the sky?

TOMMY: Yessssss (getting tired of the questions by this time).

LITTLE GIRL: Tommy, do you see the teacher?

TOMMY: Yes

LITTLE GIRL: Do you see her brain?

TOMMY: No

LITTLE GIRL: Then based on what we were taught today, she does not have one!

Joke of the day – Adam & Eve

July 20, 2013 | Newbloggycat

The story of Adam and Eve was being carefully explained in the children’s Sunday School class. Following the story, the children were asked to draw some picture that would illustrate the story.

Little Bobby was most interested and drew a picture of a car with three people in it. In the front seat, behind the wheel was a man and in the back seat, a man and a woman.

The teacher was at a loss to understand how this illustrated the lesson of Adam and Eve.

But little Bobby was prompt with his explanation. “Why, this is God driving Adam and Eve out of the garden!”

Joke of the day – The new teacher

June 30, 2013 | Newbloggycat

A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, “Everyone who thinks you’re stupid, stand up!” After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up.

The teacher said, “Do you think you’re stupid, Little Johnny?

“No, ma’am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!”

Joke of the day – Spell backwards

April 26, 2013 | Newbloggycat

Teacher: “Your daughter’s only five and she can spell her name backwards! Why, that’s remarkable!”

Mother: “Yes, we’re very proud of her.”

Teacher: “And what is your daughter’s name?

Mother: “Anna.”

Joke of the day – Two words

March 28, 2013 | Newbloggycat

Teacher: “I don’t allow two words in my class. One is gross, and the other is cool.”

Johnny: “So, what are the words?”

Quote of the day – Abdul Kalam

January 28, 2013 | Newbloggycat

“If a country is to be corruption free and become a nation of beautiful minds, I strongly feel there are three key societal members who can make a difference. They are the father, the mother and the teacher.” – Abdul Kalam

I believe

December 26, 2012 | Newbloggycat

I Believe

by Jane Daugherty

I believe in children’s laughter, the sweet perfume of a newborn baby’s skin and that every child is entitled to happiness, decent housing, health care, proper nutrition and good education.

I believe that our schools should be places of discovery and growth, not of danger, that teachers should be paid more than lawyers and that parenting should be a required course in every high school.

I believe that “quality time” is a phony notion that cannot substitute for substantial time spent with our children.

I believe that baseball and other children’s games can be magical and should be wrestled from screaming, competitive coaches and returned to play.

I believe that childhood should be a time of sand castles and celebration and that the defense of innocence is as important as the defense of our borders.

And I believe that our most urgent mission should be putting the needs of our children first.