Teacher: “Your daughter’s only five and she can spell her name backwards! Why, that’s remarkable!”
Mother: “Yes, we’re very proud of her.”
Teacher: “And what is your daughter’s name?
Mother: “Anna.”
Category Archives: Good clean jokes
Joke of the day – Restaurant sign
Sign in a restaurant window: “Kitchen hand wanted, to wash dishes and two waitresses.”
Joke of the day – Divorce
The pretty young wife was suing for divorce.
“On what grounds?” asked her solicitor. “You’ve got to have grounds”.
“But we do,” she assured him. “Yes we have large grounds, a 20-hectare block.”
“No, no,” he said. “Do you have a grudge?”
“Yes, we have a double garage because we have two cars”.
“No, no,” said the solicitor, near exasperation. “Does he beat you up?”
“Never,” she said. “I’m always up at six, and he sleeps in till ten sometimes.”
The solicitor finally grabbed her by the shoulders.
“Reasons!” he shouted. “What are your reasons?”
“Oh, we don’t seem to be able to communicate,” she said.
Joke of the day – The stork
“Mom”, said the little boy, “where did I come from?”
“The stork brought you, dear,” was the reply.
And where did you come from, Mom?”
“The stork brought me too.”
“And what about grandma?”
“The stork brought her too.”
“Gee,” said the little lad, “Doesn’t it ever worry you to think that
there have been no natural births in our family for three generations?”
Joke of the day – Religious parrots
The priest had two parrots and taught them religiously to say the rosary. He even had two sets of rosary beads made. After a year of rigorous training he was delighted to have them perform at country fairs.
The priest was so pleased he decided to teach another parrot the rosary and bought a new parrot from the pet shop.
When he put it into the cage one of the originals said to the other. “Throw away your beads Fred, our prayers have been answered. It’s a sheila!”
Joke of the day – Golf clubs
“Tell me Charles,” she said. “If I die before you, would you still go to our golf club on weekends?”
“Oh, I suppose so, dear.”
“I guess, after a time, you would take up with another partner?”
“Oh I suppose so, dear.”
“Tell me Charles, would you let her use my clubs?”
“No dear, she’s left-handed.”
Ever wonder why …
…who tastes dog food when it has a “new & improved” flavor?
Joke of the day – We don’t need You
There’s a group of scientists who decided that humans could do without God. So one of them looked up to God and said, “We’ve decided that we no longer need You. We have enough wisdom to clone people and do many miraculous things,”
God listened patiently and then said, “Very well, let’s have a man-making contest. We’ll do it just like I did back in the old days with Adam.” The scientists agreed and one of them bent down and picked up a handful of dirt. God looked at him and said, “No! You have to make your own dirt!”
Joke of the day – Two words
Teacher: “I don’t allow two words in my class. One is gross, and the other is cool.”
Johnny: “So, what are the words?”
Joke of the day – Punctuation
An English professor wrote the words, “Woman without her man is nothing” on the blackboard and directed his students to punctuate it correctly.
The men wrote: “Woman, without her man, is nothing.”
The women wrote: “Woman! Without her, man is nothing.”
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