The warden was making his usual round at the asylum and saw one of the inmates sitting on a small stool and holding a fishing rod. He has the end of the rod dangling in the wash basin.
Trying to be kind, the warden asked, “Catch anything?”
The inmate replied, “In a wash basin? Are you crazy?
I use to be great at WordPlay. Once a pun a time.
What do you call a magic dog?
A Labracadabrador
Shaye’s a big fan of selfies and here’s one of her latest selfie project called ‘Selfeet’.
I’m going to stand outside. So if anyone asks,
I am outstanding!
Bob, teaching his parrot to talk: “Repeat after me. I can talk.”
Parrot: “I can talk.”
Bob: “I can walk.”
Parrot: “I can walk.”
Bob: “I can fly.”
Parrot: “That’s a lie.”
A man is walking down the beach and comes across an old bottle. He picks it up, pulls out the cork and out pops a genie!
The genie says, “Thank you for freeing me from the bottle. In return I will grant you three wishes.”
The man says “Great! I always dreamed of this and I know exactly what I want. First, I want one billion dollars in a Swiss bank account.”
Poof! There is a flash of light and a piece of paper with account numbers appears right in front of him!
He continues, “Next, I want a brand new red Ferrari right here.”
Poof! There is a flash of light and a bright red, brand-new Ferrari appears right next to him!
He continues, “Finally, I want to be irresistible to women.”
Poof! There is a flash of light and he turns into a box of chocolates.
Husband: “When I get mad at you, you never fight back.
How do you control your anger?”
Wife: “I clean the toilet.”
Husband: “How does that help?”
Wife: “I use your toothbrush.”
Dear Algebra
PLEASE STOP asking us to find your X.
She’s never coming back and don’t ask Y.
What is a pumpkin’s favourite sport?
Squash!
New Bloggy Cat [NBC] 