“I’m addicted to brake fluid,
but I can stop whenever I want.”
Tag Archives: funny clean jokes
Joke of the day – Music shop
A sign at a music shop:
“Gone Chopin. Bach in a minuet.”
Joke of the day – Porsche for sale
A woman offered a brand-new Porsche for sale for a price of $10.
A man answered the ad, but he was slightly incredulous.
“What’s the gimmick?” he inquired.
“No gimmick” the woman replied.
“My husband died and in his will he asked that the car be sold
and the money go to his secretary.”
Joke of the day – Puppies for sale
“For sale: Nine adorable puppies from a German shepherd and a Siberian hussy.”
Joke of the day- Lesson on giving
The town’s richest man met with the minister after the Sunday service. “Why does everyone call me cheap and stingy?” complained the man. “I’ve told everyone I’m leaving half my money to the church when I die.”
The minister nodded. “It reminds me of the story about the pig and cow. The cow was much loved by the farmer and his neighbours, while the pig was not popular at all. The pig could not understand this and asked the cow about it.”
“How come you are so well-like cow? People say you’re generous and good because you give milk and butter and cream every day. But I give more than that. From me they get bacon and ham; they even pickle my feet. Yet I’m not popular and you are. “Why do you think that is?”
The cow replied, “Perhaps it’s because I give while I’m still alive.”
Joke of the day – My family
Bill: “My family is just like a nation. My wife is the minister of finance, my mum-in-law is minister of war and my daughter is foreign secretary.”
Sam: Sounds interesting. And what is your position?”
Bill: I’m the people. All I do is pay.”
Joke of the day – Bowling
Inside a bowling alley, “Please be quiet. We need to hear a pin drop.”
Joke of the day – Wash basin
The warden was making his usual round at the asylum and saw one of the inmates sitting on a small stool and holding a fishing rod. He has the end of the rod dangling in the wash basin.
Trying to be kind, the warden asked, “Catch anything?”
The inmate replied, “In a wash basin? Are you crazy?
Joke of the day – Wordplay
I use to be great at WordPlay. Once a pun a time.
Joke of the day – Magic dog
What do you call a magic dog?
A Labracadabrador
New Bloggy Cat [NBC] 