Mrs Jones: What is your son doing?
Mrs Smith: He is in medical school.
Mrs Jones: What is he studying?
Mrs Smith: Nothing. They’re studying him.
Author Archives: Newbloggycat
Quote of the day – Malcom Bane
“If you wait until you can do everything for everybody, instead of something for somebody, you’ll end up not doing nothing for nobody.”
– Malcom Bane
Quote of the day – Bill T. Jones
“Living and dying is not the big issue. The big issue is what you’re going to do with your time while you are here.”
– Bill T. Jones
Joke of the day ~ Mother-in-law’s visit
Jim took his Saint Bernard to the vet.
“Doctor,” he said sadly, “I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to cut off my dog’s tail.”
The vet stepped back, “Jim, why should I do such a terrible thing?”
“Because my mother-in-law’s arriving tomorrow, and I don’t want anything to make her think she’s welcome.”
Quote of the day – St. Augustine
“Hope has two beautiful daughters. Their names are anger and courage; anger at the way things are, and courage to see that they do not remain the way they are.”
– St. Augustine
Quote of the day – Paulo Coelho
“Be brave. Take risks. Nothing can substitute experience.”
– Paulo Coelho
Joke of the day – The lawyer’s son
The lawyer’s son wanted to follow in his father’s footsteps, so he went to law school and graduated with honors. Then he went home to join his father’s firm.
At the end of his first day at work, he rushed into his father’s office and said, “Father, father! In one day I broke the Smith case that you’ve been working on for so long!”
His father yelled, “You idiot! We’ve been living on the funding of that case for ten years!”
Joke of the day – Beware of dog
Upon entering a little country store, a stranger noticed a warning sign that read: “Danger! Beware of dog!” posted on the door. Inside, he noticed a harmless little dog asleep on the floor beside the cash register.
“Is that the dog folks are supposed to beware of?” he asked the owner. “Yep, that’s him,” came the reply.
The stranger couldn’t help but be amused. “That certainly doesn’t look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?”
“Because,” the owner explained, “Before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him.”
Quote of the day – David W. Johnson
“There are no speed limits on the road to excellence.”
– David W. Johnson
Happiness is …
… a perfect spot!
