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Joke of the day – Just two words

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A prince had a curse put on him when he was a little boy. He could only speak two words every year. But, if he didn’t speak for a whole year, he would then be able to speak 4 words the next year and so on.

One day he met a princess named Josie and he wanted to say “My Princess”.

The next year he saw her he wanted to say “My princess, i love you”.

The third year he saw her, he wanted to say “My princess I love you, will you marry me?” But, the young prince, now growing older knew he would have to wait a couple more years.

So, on the fifth year, excited to finally present his question, he visited the princess.

He approached her respectfully and asked, “JOSIE, MY PRINCESS, I LOVE YOU. WILL YOU MARRY ME?”

And the princess said, “Pardon?”

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Quote of the day – Marcus Tullius Cicero

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“A room without books is like a body without a soul.”

― Marcus Tullius Cicero

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Joke of the day – Flight to Boston

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A man telephoned the airline office and asked, “How long does it take to fly to Boston?” The clerk said, “Just a minute…” “Thank you,” the man said and hung up.

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Quote of the day – Robert Frost

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“Half the world is composed of people who have something to say but can’t and the other half have nothing to say and keep on saying it.”

– Robert Frost

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Joke of the day – Big turkey

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A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she couldn’t find one big enough for her family.

She asked a stock boy, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?”

The stock boy replied, “No ma’am, they’re dead.”

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Happiness is …

Thank you Lord for this delicious meal You have placed before me. Amen!

“Thank you Lord for this delicious meal You have placed before me. Amen!”

… saying grace before meals!

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Quote of the day – Lauren Kate

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“Sometimes beautiful things come into our lives out of nowhere. We can’t always understand them, but we have to trust in them. I know you want to question everything, but sometimes it pays to just have a little faith.”

― Lauren Kate

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Joke of the day – Hearing test

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There was an elderly man visiting a doctor for his check-up. As he was leaving he asked the doctor if he could recommend a specialist for his wife. “What’s wrong with her?” asked the doctor. The old man explained that her hearing was getting so bad that it was almost embarrassing. The doctor said he knew of several specialists that could help but he wanted the old man to do a little test when he got home to help the doctor determine the severity of her hearing loss. The doctor said “When you get home, make sure your wife’s back is turned to you and ask her a question. If she doesn’t respond walk closer and ask her again. Keep doing this until she answers and let me know the results”.

That night when the old man opened the door of his home he could see his wife in the kitchen preparing dinner. She was at the counter with her back to the door. “What’s for dinner?” the old man asked. His wife did not respond so he walks to the doorway of the kitchen and asked the question again. Still, he was greeted with silence. This time he walks up just behind her and asks once again “What’s for dinner?” His wife spins around a bit agitated and says “For the third time, Fried Chicken!!”

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Quote of the day – Albert Einstein

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“Coincidence is God’s way of remaining anonymous.”

– Albert Einstein

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Joke of the day – Animal crackers

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A mother and her young son returned from the grocery store and began putting away the groceries. The boy opened the box of animal crackers and spread them all over the table.

“What are you doing?” his mother asked.

“The box says you can’t eat them if the seal is broken,” the boy explained.

“I’m looking for the seal.”